One particularly insufferable day in New Jersey, I found the Will Levis L’s Down shirt and I love this perfectest thing and wished I’d had the slightest sewing ability, as it seemed like it’d be simple to reproduce. Half of it was a full length ruffly flouncy red and white polka dot skirt, while the other half was a pair of men’s wool trousers. It was so perfect for me I almost shit myself. I climbed into it as it had to be entered like pants and all these stupid faux blond face-lifted zillionaire bitches were oohing and aahing at me, whispering their envy and fear to each other. The woman running the boutique was stupid, too, or at least stupid enough to mistake me for stupid. She kept trying to explain the concept to me, the half male/half female thing, as fucking if, ya black-lipsticked, hag-looking too-black-haired eye sore! Step off and let me give you a few fashion tips!